30 Day Fast - Day 3 - You Cant Do That

Day 3 - Wednesday August 19th, 2009 – 1:03 am (Thurs)

30 Day Fast ...Reformat – Reboot and Rejuvenate in search of the truth about me.

YOU CAN'T DO THAT

(Attention Word Nazis - These blog post are written at midnight by a half conscience dyslexic - bar stool prophet foodie and are done fast and unedited to keep with the raw and pure truth of the intention of project...If the mosaic stream of conscientiousness and grammar offense you too bad...LOL )

It's 1:12 am and just walked in the door. It's amazing how one word or one phone call can totally change our perspective or our night. I am reflecting on the day and trying to formulate the method in relaying my daily self journey of discovery to the mini masses. I really don't have the delusion that anyone really is reading this save a few sweet and encouraging souls. Thanks by the way you know who you are !!

My day was like I almost lived it in reverse. It is 1:25 am I am awake when I should be sleeping. I am writing instead of dreaming. I am sitting here at my kitchen table eating dried cranberries and drinking cranberry juice out of a home made ceramic mug that I crafted several yrs back. I love this mug it turned out superbad and the underglaze paint is abstract and unique – like me.

I used to work part- time in retail ceramics ….you know the paint your own concept. My speciality was Corporate Parties and Bridal Showers they loved me...What's not to Love...Seriously !

I was up early today despite the fact that I stayed up late last night... and suffered and slaved over my keyboard so you could get a mere glimpse into the psyche of this dyslexic philosophical perfectionist procrastinator. Now that a mouthful ...try saying that 3 times fast. I can't believe you tried. LOL

I worked from home today mostly …If I were brutally honest I worked in my PJ's snuggled up in my bed with my Computer on my lap Cell beside and Ipod on low cranking out some funky tunes.Reading and responding to Email,GoogleChat,
FacebookChat, Twitter - that were surprisingly all business oriented.

Then I got distracted as I always do and followed the mad hatter down the rabbit hole and got lost in a virtual worm hole. Which only seem like minutes and when I space jumped back to reality about 4 hours had went by. The Strange thing is I moved seamlessly between both dimension without knowing or spacelag.

You see for that is the danger of working from home for me.
It too easy to have distractions.

I was pretty wound up - and decided to draw a hot bath and chill for a few. Wouldn't you know I just started soaking when my phone goes off. I am startled. I am compelled to answer it. I jump up and get it almost trip out of the tub and get up to fast and gets dizzy I answer the phone and the person keeps say “hello hello” last thing I remember I passed out momentarily luckily I was sitting down.

I flash into an altered state I see a kaleidoscope of colors and shapes and muted faces all mumbling something. I don't know if they are talking to me or what? I don't understand. I am starting to suffer from sensory overload. Your asking your self what this kid on ( I don't do Drugs or Alcohol) I snap out of it when the phone rings again. I answer it.

My friend “S”(from yesterday post..the lady who thinks everyone is lying to her.)

She yells “ Are you ok ..what the hell is going on over there” I told that I fainted. She ask if I am ok...then a few moments later proceeds to laugh hysterically. The laughter is contagious and I startle to chuckle it was odd and kinda funny situation. If you think about it. A little disconcerted I was.
"s" jokingly says “ So you have an interesting day already haven't you”

Then the conversation becomes very cool and too the point.
She ask me “Is the concept we have been discussing over the past week - that I am supposed to get is it Love...” I am shocked and can't believe what I am hearing .I ask her to repeat herself...I internally almost blew a gasket of excitement - has she figure it out ...has she come to the realization that she has been lied too and she has lied too herself all these years. Sadly no...sorry gang.

Dear sweet “S” still lost in confusion - The Veil of Lies still impeding her vision of the Truth.

I ask her if I could talk to her later since technically I was naked and cold. That's what I told her. It was true , but really I just needed a break this issue is too emotionally draining for me. I don't want to talk about anymore.

Have I opened a pandoras box. It seems that there is cosmic riff and every one is searching for truth and meaning and so intense about discussing Love and Relationships.

As the tagline for X-files state The truth is out there you just find it ! I would say you have to see what is in front of you. Which is much harder said than done at times.

So I drain the tub and tidy up the Bathroom and head back into the Bedroom.

I got dressed and started to clean up when a text comes in from my friend “Kr” and “ShG” they just read my blog and twitter feed and curious as to the real reason behind my 30 Day Fast. I Proceed to tell them simultaneously on Twitter.

It's all about Reformatting and Rebooting my mind and soul from the toxic relationships and patterns that I have held on to recently and since I currently not in relationship. The full moon is Thursday. So the timing is perfect. After several sarcastic and teasing correspondence they offered there support and caring and said they were proud of me and wished me well.

I am exhausted again and decide to have a nap - it is another day of not accomplishing my list of to do around the house. I have to tomorrow I have guest coming over for Dinner. I am good under pressure If I put my mind to I have in down in 1 ½ hr.

Ok we went through the long laborious milk run of conscientious to get to the beginning which actually is the end today ...cause I say so. Don't argue.


Its 9:05 pm and my Sister Girlfriend “Is” (soul sister ) calls me up and invites me out for dinner and a walk....she says 5 minutes but in her world 5 minutes means 20 – 40 mins...so I wait patiently for her to show up. “Is” would be late for her own funeral ...LOL


We met up and head off to a little trendy neighborhood across the bridge for downtown...and stop off at this little mom and pop mexican / pizza joint...simple homemade fare but great.

Order our food sit out on the small patio and take in the beautiful night...Jump in the car and decided to go midtown mile and walk and do a night sightseeing.

We park and head off for a quick stroll down the mile - the sights and sounds are vibrant and amusing , ugly and annoying and some just dang peculiar.


We stop in Steep a trendy organic Teahouse and peruse through there vast assortment of teas. “Is” picks up some Rooibos. Rooibos ( chai , ginger or cinnamon) is my favorite.

We head back to the when we see a young woman casually dressed pushing a shopping cart down the sidewalk and every 15 seconds looking behind her. Just plain odd.

But the oddest was the man who ask us point blankly after seeing us make a comment on a t-shirt in a hemp store ...” do we know where he can get a couple of dime bags of weed”

“Is” and I head back to the car laughing but distressed at the same time. We're in the car when we remember that a friends of ours is having a Birthday music Jam Tonight. So excitedly we head to the Tropicana. You see I have worked in Music, Stage + Film for about 18 yrs and the majority of my friends are Musician and or Artist/Activist so I know everyone - they call the unofficial mayor. LOL

We pull up and literally before we even get out the car ...I recognize the singing and the distinctive guitar playing coming from within. They play Latin – Fusion and are simply are amazing fun and infectious entertainers they travel the world to rave reviews and when they are home they play small local pubs for free.

Tonight is no difference the who's who in that circle is in attendance from Grammy Award winners from Cuba , Chile,
to Entertainers from Dominican Republic, Miami , and Dancers and Musicians from Toronto, Montreal. All In town doing the Festival Circle.

In a transition between song “Is” and I are spotted to great joy...and are nodded and waved at whilst still playing.

The set break finally happens after an extended cover remix of Santana Oye Como Va... that brings the house into an ecstatic frenzy.

When things calm down we connect with friends and with many hugs and kisses on both cheeks and too many “It's beautiful too see you “ “Where you been” “ I missed you”...and “Tonight We Dance” seriously no joking 3 people said “ Tonight We Dance” and when the music started again we did about 45 minutes straight . Then said our good byes and headed home.


So here we are again another day done...another post finished and adventure to embrace. What a oddly wild and fantastic life I have sometimes. Lets see what today brings...


Just a word of thanks for the read and support. I would really appreciate your feed back please follow me here or at Twitter and comment if you desire.....Bless You


Recipe Of The Day

Cuban Beef Stew

INGREDIENTS (Nutrition)

* 2 tablespoons olive oil
* 1 onion, chopped
* 4 cloves garlic, minced
* 1 red bell pepper, chopped
* 1 1/2 pounds sirloin tips, cubed
* 2 bay leaves
* 1/2 teaspoon ground cumin
* 1 teaspoon dried oregano
* 1/2 cup dry sherry
* 1 (8 ounce) can tomato sauce
* 2 tablespoons red wine vinegar
* 1/4 cup pimento-stuffed green olives
* 1/4 cup raisins
* 2 tablespoons capers
* 4 potatoes, peeled and quartered
* salt and pepper to taste

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DIRECTIONS

1. In a large saute pan, heat oil over medium heat. Cook onion and garlic in oil, stirring frequently, until transparent. Stir in cubed meat, and cook until browned. Stir in red bell pepper, bay leaf, cumin, and oregano; cook for 2 to 3 minutes.
2. Stir in sherry, tomato sauce, vinegar, olives, raisins, and capers. Pour in enough water to just cover meat. Bring to boil, reduce heat to low, and cover. Simmer until fork tender, about 1 1/2 hours. Add more water if the stew becomes too thick.
3. Stir potatoes into the stew. Season with salt and pepper to taste. Cook, covered, until potatoes are almost tender. Uncover, and cook until done.